Saturday, August 21, 2010

I’ve got nothing but shit.

I’ve not had much going on lately.  I’m in kind of a holding pattern waiting to see if the new meds work or if they make me into a raging psychopath (I’ve been getting a little bitchy lately so I’m starting to worry).
However…

The other day my lovely granddaughter M was running around naked.  She’s almost 15 months old but still has the super chubby baby leg rolls and chubby tummy and little chubby baby cheeks and only a little hair so she looks much younger than she is.  Basically she’s adorable naked and she loves to have her diaper off so we indulge her before bath time.  She was over by my husband and I saw she had something in her hand headed toward her mouth (everything goes in her mouth).  I ran over to her saying, “Punkin, what have you got?”  I held out my hand.  She stopped her hand traveling to her mouth and placed what was in her hand into mine.  It was bright playdoh green, lumpy, hard and warm.  I looked at it confused unable to grasp what she could have gotten a hold of until it finally dawned on me.
I said out loud, “It’s poop.”

My husband looked at me and goes, “What?”

“It’s poop.”  I said again and held me hand out palm up with the piece of poop laying in it like an offering.  With my other hand I grabbed M’s hand so she could not put her hand in her mouth.

“Ewww...” was my husband’s contribution.

I started yelling for my daughter because now that I was trying to keep M from putting her hand in her mouth she was determined to do it and was pulling against me as hard as she could.

My daughter comes wandering in from the kitchen.  “It’s poop.” And I hold it out again.  I guess I was hoping someone would take it from me but no.  She gets the baby and I go to get rid of my smelly hand companion.

Z, my other granddaughter, comes running over, “I want to see.”  So I stop my bathroom trek and turn around with the poop still balanced on my palm so she can admire her sister’s work.

Finally I get to the bathroom and dump the poop and scrub my hand.

Such is my life.  Exciting, isn’t it?

3 comments:

  1. Ewwwwwww. If it's green I bet she's been eating something w/ blue food coloring. Don't ask me how I know. I clicked over here from yr Twitter profile and was amazed to see My Life With the Thrill Kill Cult listed on yr sidebar! I was just trying to explain the band to my kids last night and failing to describe the awesomeness.

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  2. I love My Life with the Thrill Kill Cult and everyone who lives in my house must deal. I am a music dicatator.

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  3. Oh, man! We have had some really interesting things happen with poop in this household. I'm sorry that you had to walk around with poop in your hand, but I'm glad that it didn't get eaten and that stuff like this happens to someone besides me.

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